I Am Not A Sheep

Marco is one of the most annoying people I know. I'm used to being right most of the time the past nineteen years. This man, however, is used to being right the past twenty-five years. It makes all the difference when the man in question is an intellectual Nazi—and no it doesn't sound as cool when you're on the receiving end of constant intellectual bullying.

I'm not used to being the immature kid in any relationship, romantic or otherwise. I'm usually the practical one, thinking, saying and doing the practical things any situation might require. This gives me an unnecessary and oftentimes overblown self-assurance which turns people off—but I get things done the way I feel they should (not necessarily correct of course) with minimum hitches. But with Marco? Gods.

He fights me every step of the way. Sometimes he's doing it because he believes his way is the righter way, but often he's doing it just for the hell of it. I have a nasty suspicion that he just loves being the one right, even though I am as right as he is. Maybe this is what they're saying about two opposite poles being attracted to each other, but opposite poles my ass. The novelty is wearing off and at this point, I just don't want to argue about abortion or if we should go out on a Saturday or if Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo can be blamed for the staggering numbers of extrajudicial killings in the past six years. Fuckit.

I'm not saying I'm always right because I'm as good as hell not. I don't mind being told I'm wrong, but the telling does not have to have a "you're really dumb do you know that?" undertone to it. It's just plain insulting because whatever I am—-vain, self-centered, selfish, egotistic, disorganized, obnoxious, whatever—I am not dumb. There are so many ways to correct or criticize a person without sounding condescending and patronizing. Marco, apparently, is not aware of such methods.

"Why don't you ever listen to me?" he says. In my book, this question translates to: why don't you ever do everything I tell you to?

"Because I'm not a sheep. If you want subservience and meekness in your partner, get a sheep. She can keep you warm at night. If you're hungry, you can cut off her limbs and get a first class dinner," I said to his face.