What If Asymptotes Were People?

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What If Asymptotes Were People?

September 4, 2007

play for the goddamned emo mood.

What is wrong what is wrong what is wrong. I've been feeling awful lately. I feel isolated, displaced, guilty, reckless, restless, depressed—sure I know why, but feeling this way is not how I usually deal with my problems. Either I go shopping, read, blast my eardrums off with annoying punk gunk, or I just simply pretend that I have no problem. I mean, gods, a problem is just a goddamn state of mind. You get it out of there and it's as good as gone as taxes laundered into Swiss accounts or cotton candy left too long out in open air.

I've gone shopping. I've read four books since Thursday. I've downloaded a lot of songs like the internets will be broken tomorrow. I pretended i have no issues and it was okay for a while. Why do I feel like this then? There is something definitely fishy, and it's not your unwashed dick. I've been repressing a lot of things these past nineteen years and apparently, these things are festering. If this keeps up long enough, I might do something very stupid one of these days. Something which I can reasonably guess that I will regret. As well as everyone else around me.

So to my question: what if asymptotes were people? They are egged on by chance or by destiny or by the cold laws of mathematics to be close to each other. But they never meet. I wonder, how do they feel as they approach infinity, getting nearer to each other by a hairwidth, by a molecule, by an atom, but never getting there? Maybe they keep on believing that infinity has got to end at some point in space, and there, along with the impossibility of infinity with an end, ends the impossibility of them never touching, and they touch. Maybe they eventually resign themselves to the fact that there is just in their imagination. Or maybe they don't have any imagination. Maybe they are just dumb lines, or dumb people, indulging themselves in the delusion that they are alive. Maybe.

Posted by lizette at 11:38 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

All I can say, Liz, is that every women I have ever fell in love with were asymptotes.

As for your manic depression, just hang in there and you’ll find company. *grins*

Posted by Kris at September 5, 2007, 9:32 am

Why do we have to feel so hopeless? That’s my take - I didn’t get it initially. Just don’t jump off a building. Better yet, just don’t jump off and get fried before going down cold pavement. I’ll not like you for that.

Posted by Niko at September 5, 2007, 10:06 pm

niko: there are creative ways to die, i hear.

Posted by lizette at September 5, 2007, 10:09 pm

What a question. I dunno the answer. As for your bad feelings, just hang in there. They, too, shall pass.

Posted by Tom at September 6, 2007, 5:10 pm

I think that’s what I meant, Liz.

Posted by Niko at September 7, 2007, 12:27 pm

“what if asymptotes were people?” and what if they are not…. maybe there would be chaos because the infinity they are aspiring for, don’t exist at all. Their death won’t matter. It is like the end of imagination. It is poverty or abandonment of being.

whatever infinity is..

—-

about your rants..he he.. ei you’re only nineteen.. why are you anticipating regrets this early?

Posted by dave at September 7, 2007, 12:29 pm

It’s amazing how everytime I read your blog, I feel like you’re talking for me. Expressing things better than I can, and even explaining to me what I’m feeling. I’m not kidding!

I feel so depressed right now. and usually I just shrug off my problems. But now, I just feel unusually weak.

other things I feel the same about:
*problems w/ course.
*boobs thing (32A rin ako. :p)
*being a hoarder

thanks for blogging your thoughts. It helps me somehow.